Sunday, August 30

There is Always a Man

I have been absent from writing, this is due to enjoying life. The fall begins and for the first time I don't have to worry about college. I picked up my degree the other day and it's official! I am a college graduate! I graduated Cum Laude too, which I didn't even realize was an honor.

I am working the U.S. Open for the next two weeks. I still don't know if I'm working tomorrow, but we shall see. It will be an experience to say the least.

Tuesday, August 25

Catch Me I'm Falling

I would like to record the last few dreams I have been having. My therapist says that they are significant and my unconscious has been telling me something. The last several nights my nightmares have been distressing and though I wake up relieved they are not real, it's still disturbing nonetheless.

  1. My first dream is that I am in my apartment. My roommate, our friend who is subletting and myself are in the living room. A giant python is slithering across the floor from inside the radiator into my room. I am distressed and telling the other two we should get rid of it. I mean there's a GIANT FUCKING SNAKE in the apartment! Yet, they do nothing. At one point the snake slithers by me and touches my leg.
  2. Alice Ripley's Tony speech is playing from every direction. She is angry and screaming about art. I am offered a job and I say, "That's fine as long as I have a week before the drug test." heh.
  3. An acquaintance of mine is trying to murder me. He is a schizophrenic and one personality is nice to me, while the other is trying to murder me. I am the only one who realizes this and I tell my friends and roommate about it. No one believes me, but thinks that the acquaintance has a twin brother who is insane. They tell me he must be the one and I should find him. No one believes that they are the same person.
  4. Last night I dreamed that I missed my registration for the Wardrobe Union. I woke up (in my dream) and it was 1. I couldn't tell if it was 1 AM or 1 PM. If it was the day of the registration or if I had slept through the day and it was the next day. I look outside and it's dark and I just cannot tell what day it is.
The last dream was actually a sleepwalking occurrence. On Sunday morning I woke up in my roommates bed and had no idea how I got there. I went into my room around 6 AM and noticed that my bed hadn't been slept in. Apparently I came into the room and was convinced someone was in the apartment.

These have been my dreams. Weird, right?

Moment to Remember

Tomorrow I will be registering with the Wardrobe Union Local 764. It does not mean I will have a secured job, but it means I'm one step closer to joining the union and getting a job. This is how it works I suppose. These steps that lead to what I've been working toward for the last year. It's a slow uphill climb, but I'm getting there.

Saturday, August 22

Childhood Memories

The other day while talking to someone I had a rush of nostalgia. It was odd and surreal, to have memories that I had entirely forgotten come rushing back into my mind.

While I was a young child growing up and moving around from house to house. We had a temporary stay in a camp. The house we were building was not through, but we had sold our old one. So we lived in this camp that was in the middle of the woods.

I don't remember how long we lived in this camp, or why we were even there. It was old and musty. It was far away from everyone we knew, but it was so odd. I do remember sitting in the living room nook. I was reading the comic book version of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. I also remember something to do with being soaking wet, but that is all beyond me now.

Thursday, August 20

The Last Five Years

Today is the day I moved down to Brooklyn and have been living in the city ever since. Hurray!

Sunday, August 16

Country Side


It was a planned weekend, and it was the makings of a short story at best. The Film Critic has moved upstate. I spent the weekend with him, we saw movies and swam in lakes and ponds. I met Sophisticated people and I ate fresh strawberries.

The Film Critic and I have fun content and passionate times together, but where is the warmth? I'm fine with it, that's what makes it such a short story. It's a memory in the making, there really will never be a future in it. I will enjoy it while it lasts. It was a nice getaway and a fun little trip. I got a tan out of the whole thing and to get to know another person.

Saturday, August 8

The Diary of Judas Iscariot

As I showed the list of facts the Dumb Girl at my temp job had written earlier to the two stocky girls and the head temp at lunch. I never expected my betrayal to ever get back to me. Ah, karma.

The stocky duo were dangerously annoying when they were together. The gossip flowed like a deep spring when lunch came along. I was naturally the source of all the gossip because I always kept my ears open and my intuition going. Plus, no one gets to know people better then I do. I let them create the topics, then I set my ears to find out all about what they wanted to know. In retrospect, I never realized that my sneakiness would ever backfire. I made one fatal mistake, I allowed a straight man to get involved.

The Head Temp is one of those people that has douche bag written all over him. I'm convinced he is a repressed homosexual, which just adds to his large file of obnoxious facts. He has a girlfriend, but it's a long distance relationship and he tries to be as witty as me, but fails most often. This makes him being my superior even more difficult, it's my issue with male authority over my life. Naturally I set off on a schemer campaign against him.

He was the ruler and we were the bourgeois! He was the reason this job was terrible and the Latina Woman knew all our faults! He must fall and I was going to lead this revolution, but from the dark. So the story continues on . . .

I was preparing for my speed dating by writing a list of facts about myself and the dumb girl thought it would be fun to write her own list:
Dumb Girl's List—
  1. I am 23-years-old
  2. My favorite color to look at is green, but my favorite color to wear is black because it's neutral.
  3. I like people who are good looking.
  4. I have/ have had 11 piercings.
  5. I think most people are lazy and eat unhealthy.
  6. I like to people watch.
  7. I love my father, so don't even try to compare to him, because you cannot.
Needless to say, this is the kind of information that the Stockier girls would love. So I saved the list and waited until lunch to reveal my information. They thrived off it and went off, then along comes the Head Temp. I was in such a whirl of success I showed him the list, because I knew he disliked the Dumb Girl. How silly now to not realize my fatal move.

We returned from lunch and I was glowing like a bride to be. Dear friends, karma is a bitch and I will learn this at a later date. I sit down next to the Dumb Girl who is attempting to look perplexed. Before I could utter a word, the Head Temp appears and says:

"So, I saw your list of dating facts." Two things happened between the dumb girl and I in that very sentence. For her, she became confused and for me, I gained clarity. Did this hetero-anal-douche see how this was the first rule of gossip etiquette! Never tell the person who you talk trash about, find out!

"Who . . .Wha. . .?" The dumb girl began, the little thoughts she had were beginning to form.

"Oh, he saw it while it was on the table this morning!" I quickly interjected. Should I take my cyanide capsule now or in the men's room?

"Ahhh. . .Wha. . .t did you think?" She added and I felt calm again, I would have my life for one more day!

"If I heard any of those I would probably run away from you. . ." He added and my eyes grew wide. "My favorite color to look at is green, but I like to wear black because. . ." He quoted and I stood up, my office chair flew back. I held out a pointed finger and screamed!

"That's cause you're a fucking faggot! Shut up you repressed butt pirate! You are a condescending and manipulative homo and I will not let your need to be as funny as me give me away! If you finish that setence, I swear I will leave this office and in two hours! TWO HOURS! The entire city will know you're a queen! Especially that GIRL who you keep hidden in a different state!"

He fell to the ground weeping.

In spite of everything, I still believe that people are good at heart. . .

Tuesday, August 4

It Dawned On Me Today . . .

That if I were ever to become famous, suddenly everything I've written here will seem relevant. Until then . . .well that is just irrelevant.