Iguana Takes a New Approach

Okay, Okay.

So the last post was a little bit of a downer, I agree. I need to make sure I don't have those anymore.

So college is getting back into full swing. I have already dropped one class, but I feel it was for the best. Besides I'll get to it when I get to it.

Other classes look interesting though.

Tomorrow I secured a ticket for The Coast of Utopia Part 3. That's right.

I ordered some cream for my current itchy problem. I know I should go to the doctor, but alas I'll try this first.

Really I ask you, what is life if you don't have some issue going on in your life? Some could laugh at that question, but it is very true to me it seems.

W stayed at my place for the first time last night. I introduced him to Ruthless People, truly an excellent movie of the 80s.

I'm trying to take a positive outlook at life and things as they come. I think it's how I got a new ticket for the show and I hope it's how my life will start to get better as far as luck goes. I've never been here to burn bridges, but make them stronger.

I can't wait to find out what show I am assigned to in school. I hope it's Red Light Winter or Inner Gardens. I shall hopefully find out soon.

Iguana Has Bad Luck

Finally the power is back on. Maybe I should back up...

My next semester of school has started, but to celebrate my final weekend of vacation...and by vacation I mean working constantly. I had a wonderful run of bad luck. I'll admit I am a little upset cause all the bad is happening at once, but there's no silver lining following it up.

First: My sketchy apartment, and it is VERY sketchy. Lost power this weekend. It wasn't a ConEdison malfunction...nope. It was the fact that my sketchy landlord didn't pay the bill in a while. So I stayed with W...which seems like a silver lining, but I'll get there.

So I stayed with W, which was nice and touching. But I didn't get to accomplish any of my goals for the weekend. Just meaningless everyday stuff. Like do my laundry and get food. However, it seems a space has opened for that to be accomplished tomorrow. I'm getting there.

So the last month I've been VERY itchy. I thought it was just the cold weather and heat and all that jazz. Turns out I may have scabies or bed bugs. Yea time to get a little distraught right? Even someone like me can get them. Seeing as my whore days have been months and months ago. I don't think I got them from sex, but who knows.

Now the easy thing to do would be to go to my doctor. Oh wait the earliest appointment to get in touch with her is March 2nd...Excuse me? I told the woman over the phone is was slightly serious and I couldn't wait until March 2nd. She offered no help. So I tried my doctors beeper number. Well it turns out beepers are more difficult to use than I thought. Unless she's just not calling me back. Who knows.

So now I feel guilty as I have probably given W whatever I have, after sharing a bed with him for the last 3-4 days.

You think that's all?? Nope it's still not over.

Tomorrow night I was thrilled to be seeing the Final part of the Coast of Utopia. To find out today they canceled their first preview. So there goes that show tomorrow. Thusly I have to try and get a ticket to another performance, which might not be possible. So I will have seen the first two parts and the ending will go unknown to me. If this is so, I will forever hold a grudge against Tom Stoppard and his writing difficult works so that the cast has to cancel at least three different shows.

I think that's about it.

A friend says I should prorate my rent and take out the two days worth of time I wasn't there. I agree. I'm just nervous to do it.

Edit: I think I got the bugs from my mattress that came with my room...it would NOT surprise me. And doing the math it would make the most logical sense.

Iguana Stays In

I have decided to stay in tonight, which is a nice relief though. I've been oh so active this week. I suppose it's the subliminal notion that my Winter Vacation is ending this week. Plus I really enjoy going on dates with W. He's very sweet.

It's strange to actually have met someone who wants to actually hang out normally. Not to point out any specific people in the city, mainly EVERYONE. We're all guilty of it though. I'm guilty of it too. When it comes to dating though it always seems like no one wants to ever meet up after the second date. W is much different though. He's a Pieces, which is no surprise, since the last two serious relationships I've had were Pieces too.

This week we (look at me I'm like the royal family) went to the latest Richard Foreman Show called Wake Up Mr. Sleepy, Your Unconscious Mind is Dead!

Different is a word to describe it best. Not the traditional theater I am used to see. Which is OK with me. I like seeing different kinds of shows that will make me think, or see the venue I adore so much in a different light.

The last night we went to the NYC Ballet to see Jerome Robbins: An American Icon. Since the NYC Ballet has brought much stress into my life. I won't talk much about it. All I can say is that each piece was so different and amazing at the same time. The final dance was an ode to a scene from the movie You Never Were Lovelier. You can see a slowed down version on youtube.com if you are up for it. Just watch from 1:35 between 2:40 minutes. The dance Robbins created from it was phenomenal.

I am excited to be returning back to school. Work is nice, BUT it stresses me out five days a week. My job stresses me out a touch. My coworkers are really lacking in the humor department and very overloaded with the cynical. It gets to be a little bit of a downer. Plus my boss is a Libra and I find them difficult to understand sometimes.

As much as I don't like being an Eternal Student, I like it because it puts work second in my life. I don't like it when my job is first priority. At least a job that I only REALLY do to make money. I've much rather have a job I enjoy. Like...hm...

Working for theater...Working for theater? Really? There's a thought to ponder on a cold night.

Iguana Remembers Suddenly, Last Summer

Last week I had the fortunate advantage of seeing my first Tennessee Williams show. Which it's about time since he is responsible for my namesake, one of my idols and the main object of many nocturnal emissions.

Suddenly, Last Summer was the show. I had read the play and seen the movie months ago, but was waiting for the right chance to see the show (ideally before it closed this last Saturday, Jan 20th).

Now don't get me wrong, the movie is funny and awful at the same time. Katherine Hepburn has some great scenes and as does Liz Taylor, but as for the integrity of the story, it was completely lost in the movie.

The stage show is 90 minutes long and is roughly put into three distinct Acts. The first Act is Mrs. Venerable speaking with the doctor about her dead son (the unseen character who is the main reason for the show in general). He is an enigma and is supposed to remain that way. Mrs. V has some great monologues, especially one including the Encantadas, baby turtles and hungry Seagulls.

The second Act is the introduction of some minor characters and the misunderstood Catherine Holly. The audience is lead to believe that Catherine is indeed insane and that this "story" everyone keeps mentioning is just the ranting of a crazy woman.

The third Act is the most intense and high energized part of the show. It's when Catherine tells the story of her cousins demise. The long monologue takes the energy of a talented actress and Carla Gugino was indeed a perfect choice. The difference between her portrayal and Liz Taylor's is simple. Liz was TOO feminine for the role.

Liz can play an excellent Maggie the Cat because even though Maggie is trash, she has spent all her time putting up a mask of Southern grace and delicacy. While Catherine Holly has a similar characterization, she never wanted to be seen as fancy. My favorite line of Catherine's is:

"I came out in the French Quarter LONG before I came out in the Garden District!"

Gugino had an excellent grasp of the character. She had a brashness in her voice that suggested she was someone who could possess southern grace, but also had that hint of Liz can't help but play the rich snobby girl cause she looked and acted the role so well. insanity to it. Watching her cousin's untimely end helped add to that. As her story unfolds you couldn't help but understand why it would drive a person to hysterics.

I don't intend to give any of the storyline away. It's strange and sordid though! The show runs like a 90 minute marathon, by the end you are exhausted. I have rarely gone to a show where in only 90 minutes I felt like I had been run through the mill. Not in a bad way do I mean this.

Tennessee Williams meant to do this to his audience, he wanted to share some of the insanity that Catherine Holly felt when she witnessed what happened to her cousin. And in the end you do. It builds and builds until finally she reveals what happens and then what...where do you go from there? You feel empty and slightly disturbed that you now know what you know.

In short, it's PERFECT.

Iguana Wishes He was a Chameleon

I'm sitting here watching my Judy Garland TV Show Collection and let me tell you, nothing brightens my day like Judy singing anything. She could sing about Cancer and I was feel the emotion. Right now it's Stormy Weather, and I just can't stop looking at it. In fact I am not even watching what I type, pretty good, eh?

But onto the real reason for this post...A topic I hold near and dear to my heart...

Gay Bashing

Last night, after another great night with W and his roommate D (Who is a hoot I might add!) We were on the Q Train on the way home from a bar Where I had met several of W's friends and had them approve of me basically. It's a common place thing in the world of dating I suppose. Now granted it was 1:30 am, and we were being normal. And yes it was obvious that we were three gay males riding the subway.

W is very fashion conscious so he was wearing a pair of gay shoes, D has a feminine voice and is rather loud (but in a funny way) and I...well I'm always gay and I don't try to hide it.

So I knew the moment the 6 Hispanic thugs got onto the train it was going to cause a disruption. So it did.

The difficult thing about being verbally attacked by ignorance is that as gay men we are FAR to witty to even attempt to say anything. So when one of them had the nerve to say,

"Hey gay guys...fuck you."

It always takes you by surprise. The gay men who live in Manhattan may have to go through this, but my heart goes out to all the gay men who try to be themselves in Brooklyn. I hate to think of the fact that I need to hide myself when I'm riding on the Q Train, but apparently so. I will be the first to admit in times like this I turn into a big old Noel Coward. In high school I rarely dealt with homophobia, even though I was out and very open with my sexuality. It also helped with the fact that those who I knew disagreed with me, I kept away from as all costs. Not so much in fear, just the idea of that why should I deal with these people if they don't even accept me for who I am?

W and D had different High School experiences. W was apparently beaten up many times in High School and such. He learned to fight and was waiting for one of them to make a move. While I sat there with my eyes closed, wishing it would just end.

As I said, it's pointless to fight/reason/speak to these kind of people purely for the fact that nothing will get through to them, and what they are waiting from is a reaction. Then actually listening to what they said is almost as asinine as you can imagine. They were telling US that we hated Spics because they we were faggots. Huh? Why do I hate you?

If I hated you, who would clean my house? Who would bag my groceries?

I can't hate those that perform the simple routines of life that I take for granted. However, I DO hate YOU because you have the nerve to offend me for no necessary reason.

D said, if he had a gun, not only would he shoot those mocking us, but the people on the train who just had the nerve to sit there and listen to it. I can't even say it was our battle to fight, because we did nothing to get involved. We were just as innocent at those sitting on the train. It's all very upsetting to me.

Luckily the train we needed was across the platform at one station so after about five or so minutes (which seemed like forever), we were able to leave the train. Of course once we got onto the other train then the thoughts and feelings started to pour out.

It's really difficult to say I wish I had done something, or that I SHOULD HAVE done something. Stood for myself. But I ask you this if there's only one of you (even three of you), versus 5-6 Hispanics...would you REALLY speak out? I wish I could say I would've. I always just say to myself, "You have a future, they don't...they will never have a future. They will be the ones who pick up unemployment when you're living happily."

It hurts to have such a thing like that happen, and the feeling never really fades. You never get used to it. You just deal with it in your own way.

Note: I don't mean this entry to be offensive to anyone other than the Hispanic men who harassed me

Iguana Discusses his New Beau

So as I mentioned last time I met a guy. I'm looking for the proper song that displays my feelings. The first song that came to mind was, There is More To Love from Aspects of Love. Giulietta sings this song and listening to it made me realize how I feel about the hooking up in general...

There is more to love, so much more than simply making love, that's easy. Gazing into eyes, pretty eyes which could be any eyes that's crazy. Hands are just hands a face is just a face, they come and go, they're easy to replace. There is more to love so much more than moonstruck escapades that's nothing. There is peace of mind, so much peace in quiet company, that's something.

I know it's an ALW musical and therefore it must be awful, but this one song is so true of anyone who has played the mistress, or other woman in any situation. You just realize that life isn't all about sex and there is something more to feel out there, then you begin to wonder if you'll ever find it.

I shall be calling this guy, this new interest, W, and well my weekend was spectacular. We went on our first date on Wednesday to go and see Pan's Labyrinth, which was nice and we immediately got along stunningly. Of course since it was a movie we didn't get to speak much. When we did talk I was my normal crazy self, so at the end of the date I figured he'd seen into my insanity and was probably not going to call me again. To my surprise we made out second date that night, after I got home. We decided to do a cheap dinner and get sometime to talk. W is a little older, and I found out his definition of cheap dinner is much different from my definition. But I didn't mind it because he was so charming.

We ate dinner, talked, held hands, etc. It was wonderful. A REAL date, my first real date. We got dessert at a chocolate shop and I showed him what a pig I could be, I got a chocolate piece of pizza (yea they make those) while he got a hot chocolate. We sat in Union Square and talked until 2:30 am. It was very romantic.

Low and behold we planned another date on Sunday!! I know, is this normal? In NYC of all places. I thought I was supposed to wait at least a month before them pretending to be interested in seeing me again.

This time we went to The Met and saw some of the galleries there and then to RICE for dinner where I had a gift certificate for a dinner for two. I thought there would be a limit of how much we could spend. Nope. So after two appetizers, two meals, five glasses of wine each, and two desserts. We spent well over 100 on the bill (something I've never done on a dinner for two), we left and continued to walk for a little more and just enjoy each others company.

It was very special. Nice and interesting. We meld, but here's the kicker...

He doesn't know anything about theatre.

I know right? But he always seems interested when I talk about it, I try to watch myself though, as not to bore him to death, or drive him away. It's happened before sadly.

So tonight I am spending the night at his place. I'm meeting his roommate/best friend. I'm a little nervous, but I've dealt with worse. The most chivalrous thing he's done to date. He's coming all the way into Manhattan late tonight to accompany me to his place.

I'm expecting to wake up any moment now.

Iguana Discusses his Sexual Preference

So it's happened, by some strange chance of fate I have met a good guy. I am still slightly in shock that it happened. So quickly. Maybe it's because I'm a normal person, who is not an asshole or so slutty that I can easily get bored of people.

I always find in this city that people are always looking for the next best thing. You meet someone you like, but oh wait they smoke, that means they're not for you, got to keep looking. You meet someone new and they are too old or too young, that's NO good, keep looking. Oh this guy seems great, wait he he's a bottom and you prefer bottoming. That's NO good either!!

I'll let some of you in on a little fact. These things are all trivial, and yet they rule most gay men's lives. I was speaking with someone and they said how with with straight people it doesn't matter because a penis will always go into a vagina. But with two men it's more difficult...

Though perhaps trying to be insightful, I don't necessarily agree with that statement at all. My last long term relationship, in truth both my ex and I were bottoms. Sex was fun, if at times experimental and filled with learning. It wasn't until I moved to the city that suddenly I was labeled a BOTTOM. I know that I like to bottom, but I also would like to top too. But in the world of quick sex and hookups, these lines NEED to be defined. You can't have ambiguity or uncertainty in the hookup world.

That's why I accepted the role of bottom and played it flawlessly I might add. But with a relationship I am more than happy with the idea of switching around, if that's what my partner would like.

Though we haven't had sex yet and aren't for a little while. Another big relief I am enjoying. I shall REALLY worry about it when the time comes. I think it's once you stick to these labels that all your REAL trouble begins.

This entry was going to be about my date, but it's diverted into this...

Iguana Has No Identity

One of my New Year's resolutions has already gone awry. I wanted to switch banks and open a checking and savings account at one better, easily located bank.

My current one is no where to be found, except for ATMs at CVS (which are also a rare find in this city). So as I can easily take money out, I can never seem to put it back in. I also think they only chose CVS as a affiliate because it matches the color scheme of the bank itself.

I went to the new bank I had picked HSBC because I seem them everywhere in the city, they are upstate as well (near my hometown), and it just seemed very convenient. So it seemed simple right?

Then I went to open it. Since my current living situation is anything but legit some problems arose. There is nothing like a nice reminder that you are living in limbo technically cause you have no proof of your residence. I have no lease or bills I pay in my name (I should be complaining necessarily), but I mean I still pay them. So when the lady asked me for proof of residency to my new address, not listed on my license. I couldn't come up with a single piece of information. Someone suggested trying to bring in a pay stub. Since my address is listened on that.

It's my only real hope. Unless someone else has any sort of tip they would like to share.

Iguana Has His Spring's Awakening

Yesterday I saw Spring's Awakening, and loved it. First, this was the first musical I have seen in a while where I went in knowing none of the musical and only the script from the original play. It's been getting rave reviews, and I can see why. As far as progressive musicals go this one is great!

I've heard some complaints about how the story is dated and the music all sounds the same. I say to shame to that. It's a rock musical. No, not a 1970s Jesus Christ Superstar Rock Opera, not a pseudo rock Opera of the early 90s like RENT. This is a perfect rock musical of the 2000s.

We forget that times are changing and thus tastes and musical style change as well. The rock aspect of the musical only ties together the dated story and makes it more poignant in the end. What they never specifically tell is that all the characters in the show are supposed to be 14-15 years old. When you can grasp that concept, suddenly the show seems much more enlightening.

During the "rape" scene it's not two 18 year old finally getting it on. It's a girl who has no idea about sex, and a boy who is very curious about it. There is no real love felt between them, and due to their lack of knowledge from their parents and teachers, they can't foresee the dire results this curious copulation will lead to.

Much is to be taken into account for most of the show. Now I have a 13 year old sister and I've heard the music she listens to. The songs they sing in this show bare such a striking resemblance to this that I couldn't help appreciate how well it was captured. A young teenager going through puberty wouldn't sing a beautiful ballad about his urge to masturbate or his frustrations about feeling suicidal thoughts. You then are left with these characters from the 1800s who may leave you thinking, "How can I relate," but the songs are the relation. The feelings in 1890s were very similar to that what teens go through today.

This is the perfect modern musical for my generation and I really hope it has a long and lasting run.

Now onto my normal life:

As I have just ended the Glass Menagerie part of my life and I have said goodbye to my Gentleman Caller, I have possibly started the The Milk Train Doesn't Stop Here Anymore part of my life. I have recently met an Older Gentler-man who (if this storyline continues of course) who I will call Goforth (as in Sissy Goforth). We had been corresponding online during Christmas and he was very sweet and nice. Last night we met up and hit it off pretty well. The best part of it, we didn't have sex. The option, as always was there, but we didn't have sex and that's all that matters. He is a dresser on a VERY popular Broadway show and I admire that a lot. That's all I shall say for now, cause who knows. The passing phases of men are fickle nowadays.

Of course the one thing about it all is he's significantly older than me. If he's Goforth, then I am Chris Flanders (the Angel of Death).

Iguana Goes to Chicago After 10 Years

Finally after it's been on Broadway for ten years, and moved between three different theaters, I have finally seen Chicago on Broadway.

I know it took me long enough and it probably was assumed that I had seen it already amongst the many musical I have already seen.

The reason I never saw the musical was due to the fault of the movie. I both love and hate the movie. Just as every movie-musical destroys the integrity that the musical it was based on, it can be done well. I mean West Side Story, Cabaret and Showboat needed to make changes in order to reach a film viewing audience. The same with Chicago. The revival is amazing though.

The bandstand setting, the black lacy costumes, and the amazing dances all meld together so well. It's no wonder this show has lasted as a ten year revival (where most revivals close down eventually). Someone I know even said it was what they considered the perfect musical, and I could possibly agree. Ann Reiking/Bob Fosse's choreography is stunning and the dancers all have amazing bodies that the sexuality of the songs shows through. The Kander and Ebb songs are beautiful on the ears, never too complicated to listen to, like some Sondheim melodies can be.

Plus Bebe Neuwirth is back, but playing Roxie Hart this time. Mainly because she has a new hip and Velma's fast paced dances aren't within her range anymore. She is excellent, such a wonderful presence on stage. Her cute Shirley Temple hair is perfect for the role. Brenda Braxton plays a sassy Velma and Roz Ryan's Mama Morton...well let's just say I could die listening to that woman's powerful voice. Even though she doesn't necessarily do much during When You're Good to Mama, her vocal power makes up for it.

I am glad I saw Chicago when I did because there have been many awful star names that have passed through there. Melanie Griffith and Rita Wilson to name a few. To see Bebe playing the opposite role was such a nice twist that it made it very much worth it.

Iguana Awakens the Evil Again

So I need to control myself. As Miss Marple used to say,

"I feel my nemesis getting the best of me."

My nemesis being my sex drive. I was doing very well, but now that school has ended I am feeling that notion to constantly fill an empty void...I guess I mean my ass? I'm setting myself for a whole world of comments on that one.

So in continuing my continuing revenge on my Gentleman Caller's(GC) subtle mocking of my lack of sex life...I made acquaintances with a different GC.

He was nice and cordial as I like most of my men, I wore my pink taffeta dress and was stunning I must say. The main reason I was interested in meeting him was the fact he had tattoos and after having my own tattoos I thought it might be fun to meet with someone of the same interests.

Needless to say we had some tattoos in common. He had little bars on his ear that he got done out of vanity. I had stars on my pec that I did for vanity too. He had FAGGOT spelled out in sign language on his arm. I had FAGGOT spelled out on my arm, by way of Anita Morris. We got along well.

But the best thing was when I discovered he was a professor as my previous college that I transferred from! I won't go into specifics but I knew the moment he said that I needed to sleep with him. That's when I felt the nemesis waking up inside me.

Like a wolf raised in captivity that even though he's domesticated, goes wild once he smells blood. I knew what I wanted to do...or wanted him to do to me. Since most men get along with me it moved along nicely and before long I had accomplished my goal.

He kept calling me a trooper and telling me how well I can take it. To which I responded:

"I'm insatiable.

It's funny, all gay men thing their GODS. I mean he was good, and he knew how to push the right buttons but I've had a little better.

Listen to me...see this is my nemesis coming out in full bloom. So I'll continue (since it's here and all):

It wasn't until after I left that I began to feel energized. A darker feeling inside of me waking up. I had just had sex with my first professor who technically taught at my school when I went there and even though I never had a class with him. Several of my friends probably did take a class with him. I felt justfully satisfied and thought to myself:

"Fuck you Gentlemen Caller...You can't get better than me, and now you're not going to!"

Thank GOD I plan on just staying in tonight to play Final Fantasy XII and being a good little Eccentric Iguana.

Iguana Break's His Favorite Glass Piece

It's 2007 and yesterday is the unofficial date of the start of this blog. Due to waking at 2:30pm, no post was made. So it's a good thing I started this blog earlier, so you wouldn't get the idea that I am efficient with posts.

Lots to discuss this weekend so lets start.

Item 1:
I called it quits with my Gentleman Caller, yea that's right! Laura Wingfield is done with her Gentleman Caller, the south can rise again. For those of you familiar with The Glass Menagerie you probably know of the closing scene where Laura meets the Gentleman Caller(GC) and they hit it off. They dance and kiss and all seems good. Then the GC accidentally bumps into her Glass Menagerie and breaks her Unicorn (her favorite piece), but because Laura is taken by this man she doesn't mind. Then the GC tells her he's engaged and he needs to go back to his fiancee. Laura then proceeds to go insane and viciously murder the GC smearing his blood all over her Glass Menagerie. Oh wait that's the ending in my mind.

Well with my specific GC I had the same kind of event happen. Things were going good for a while, I was enjoying his company and he mine. Then he brought up that topic I HATE to discuss with men I sleep with.

"You've been sleeping with other people? You know I sleep with other guys, right?"

Um yea I do know that. And when I told him, that I haven't been he simply said, "Why not you're so young you should." Not that I haven't thought about it, or as some of you may know, I have LIVED that life. I just didn't feel like it at this time. But what gets me more than agitated about this topic is that, why is it any of his business?

I'm sleeping with you at this moment sir. Just be happy with that notion. Unless you were asking me that question to follow up with, "Cause I think we should move to the next level and start dating exclusively." My sex life should really not be any of your concern outside of us.

So that is my equivalent of my GC breaking my favorite unicorn. He flipped a switch in my mind. As we continued to have sex that night it turned into old hat. I know longer enjoyed, no longer really wanted to please him in anyway.