I'm sitting here watching my Judy Garland TV Show Collection and let me tell you, nothing brightens my day like Judy singing anything. She could sing about Cancer and I was feel the emotion. Right now it's Stormy Weather, and I just can't stop looking at it. In fact I am not even watching what I type, pretty good, eh?
But onto the real reason for this post...A topic I hold near and dear to my heart...
Gay Bashing
Last night, after another great night with W and his roommate D (Who is a hoot I might add!) We were on the Q Train on the way home from a bar Where I had met several of W's friends and had them approve of me basically. It's a common place thing in the world of dating I suppose. Now granted it was 1:30 am, and we were being normal. And yes it was obvious that we were three gay males riding the subway.
W is very fashion conscious so he was wearing a pair of gay shoes, D has a feminine voice and is rather loud (but in a funny way) and I...well I'm always gay and I don't try to hide it.
So I knew the moment the 6 Hispanic thugs got onto the train it was going to cause a disruption. So it did.
The difficult thing about being verbally attacked by ignorance is that as gay men we are FAR to witty to even attempt to say anything. So when one of them had the nerve to say,
It always takes you by surprise. The gay men who live in Manhattan may have to go through this, but my heart goes out to all the gay men who try to be themselves in Brooklyn. I hate to think of the fact that I need to hide myself when I'm riding on the Q Train, but apparently so. I will be the first to admit in times like this I turn into a big old Noel Coward. In high school I rarely dealt with homophobia, even though I was out and very open with my sexuality. It also helped with the fact that those who I knew disagreed with me, I kept away from as all costs. Not so much in fear, just the idea of that why should I deal with these people if they don't even accept me for who I am?
W and D had different High School experiences. W was apparently beaten up many times in High School and such. He learned to fight and was waiting for one of them to make a move. While I sat there with my eyes closed, wishing it would just end.
As I said, it's pointless to fight/reason/speak to these kind of people purely for the fact that nothing will get through to them, and what they are waiting from is a reaction. Then actually listening to what they said is almost as asinine as you can imagine. They were telling US that we hated Spics because they we were faggots. Huh? Why do I hate you?
I can't hate those that perform the simple routines of life that I take for granted. However, I DO hate YOU because you have the nerve to offend me for no necessary reason.
D said, if he had a gun, not only would he shoot those mocking us, but the people on the train who just had the nerve to sit there and listen to it. I can't even say it was our battle to fight, because we did nothing to get involved. We were just as innocent at those sitting on the train. It's all very upsetting to me.
Luckily the train we needed was across the platform at one station so after about five or so minutes (which seemed like forever), we were able to leave the train. Of course once we got onto the other train then the thoughts and feelings started to pour out.
It's really difficult to say I wish I had done something, or that I SHOULD HAVE done something. Stood for myself. But I ask you this if there's only one of you (even three of you), versus 5-6 Hispanics...would you REALLY speak out? I wish I could say I would've. I always just say to myself, "You have a future, they don't...they will never have a future. They will be the ones who pick up unemployment when you're living happily."
It hurts to have such a thing like that happen, and the feeling never really fades. You never get used to it. You just deal with it in your own way.
W is very fashion conscious so he was wearing a pair of gay shoes, D has a feminine voice and is rather loud (but in a funny way) and I...well I'm always gay and I don't try to hide it.
So I knew the moment the 6 Hispanic thugs got onto the train it was going to cause a disruption. So it did.
The difficult thing about being verbally attacked by ignorance is that as gay men we are FAR to witty to even attempt to say anything. So when one of them had the nerve to say,
"Hey gay guys...fuck you."
It always takes you by surprise. The gay men who live in Manhattan may have to go through this, but my heart goes out to all the gay men who try to be themselves in Brooklyn. I hate to think of the fact that I need to hide myself when I'm riding on the Q Train, but apparently so. I will be the first to admit in times like this I turn into a big old Noel Coward. In high school I rarely dealt with homophobia, even though I was out and very open with my sexuality. It also helped with the fact that those who I knew disagreed with me, I kept away from as all costs. Not so much in fear, just the idea of that why should I deal with these people if they don't even accept me for who I am?
W and D had different High School experiences. W was apparently beaten up many times in High School and such. He learned to fight and was waiting for one of them to make a move. While I sat there with my eyes closed, wishing it would just end.
As I said, it's pointless to fight/reason/speak to these kind of people purely for the fact that nothing will get through to them, and what they are waiting from is a reaction. Then actually listening to what they said is almost as asinine as you can imagine. They were telling US that we hated Spics because they we were faggots. Huh? Why do I hate you?
If I hated you, who would clean my house? Who would bag my groceries?
I can't hate those that perform the simple routines of life that I take for granted. However, I DO hate YOU because you have the nerve to offend me for no necessary reason.
D said, if he had a gun, not only would he shoot those mocking us, but the people on the train who just had the nerve to sit there and listen to it. I can't even say it was our battle to fight, because we did nothing to get involved. We were just as innocent at those sitting on the train. It's all very upsetting to me.
Luckily the train we needed was across the platform at one station so after about five or so minutes (which seemed like forever), we were able to leave the train. Of course once we got onto the other train then the thoughts and feelings started to pour out.
It's really difficult to say I wish I had done something, or that I SHOULD HAVE done something. Stood for myself. But I ask you this if there's only one of you (even three of you), versus 5-6 Hispanics...would you REALLY speak out? I wish I could say I would've. I always just say to myself, "You have a future, they don't...they will never have a future. They will be the ones who pick up unemployment when you're living happily."
It hurts to have such a thing like that happen, and the feeling never really fades. You never get used to it. You just deal with it in your own way.
Note: I don't mean this entry to be offensive to anyone other than the Hispanic men who harassed me
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