Iguana Is Breaking the Glass Menagerie

Last week I was a mess I'll admit. But not without good reason. One reason being what I am about to explain here. I think my Gentleman Caller is going to be leaving my life very soon. The unicorn has been broken and well he's about to take his leave.

In all honesty, I'm not 100% sure why. He's been acting very strangely towards me, I haven't done anything wrong as far as I can tell. It all really started last Saturday when he went with me to view this apartment. I was a little down afterwards and he just outwardly said to me, "You've been complaining A LOT lately." Just like that. When aside from the moment (and this journal doesn't count because that's part of why it's here.

I found this rude and inappropriate because I think I'm allowed to complain a touch. I'm in the final weeks of school and have a lot of work. I had to spend two weeks working on my school play, while I had to balance doing finals backstage. I am going on my year anniversary of shitty living, and I am trying to move while doing all this school stuff.

Yes Gentleman Caller, I do have a little to complain about, and because a nice apartment in a beautiful neighborhood that I just saw may or may not be open to me. I can be a little sad and mopey afterwards!! And just earlier that week I told him I am there for him whenever he has a problem, and he's basically telling me to shut my mouth!

So that aside onto the REAL fun...

So Monday I get a weird call from my Ex-bf about the HIV rumor. So at the time my Gentleman Caller (at this point he had apologized for what he said on Saturday) was on G-Chat and I said, "Weird things are happening to me." And he responded to it with, "Send me an email."

Now before I continue, I want to point out that he offered that option. He invited me to tell him this...

This is the email I sent him:

"Apparently I'm well known, but for all the wrong reasons.

So way back when, like last year almost I had this threesome with this couple. I'm not sure I told you but it was freaky. It was the threesome where the one guy decided in the middle he didn't WANT to have threesomes anymore and it turned into this screaming match while the one was fucking me. Yea, fucked up, I know. I lived in Bay Ridge then, long ago.

So anyway, my ex, from a while ago too. Tells me that he's been talking to them, they're in some fucked up relationship. They fight everyday and the one guy apparently tells my Ex everything. Free Therapy. So apparently the crazier of the two hangs out with this group of slutty guys. I am assuming they probably go on manhunt and I guess he is telling people (when I'm brought up into conversation I suppose??) that I'm HIV+. Now this was all told to me secondhand, but WHAT?

I told my Ex to dig a little more. Like who is this group of slutty people? What exactly is the extent of this rumor? And what the fuck? It was 101 years ago that this failed threesome happened.

I'm not really shaken, but I don't like when people talk about me without my knowing in general. If it's under these terms it really makes me weirded out. The fact that it GOT back to me is what stirs my soul just a tad. Obviously it's enough that if I'm mentioned, that topic will come up.

So anyway, this is why I don't deal with younger men anymore. They are insane and hate me for what I am."

Now this was written past midnight so I went to bed cause I had to wake up at 6 am.

The next morning I wake up and head to the gym, but not before checking my email...Here is what his response was:

"i'm sorry to hear about this verrrry strange rumor.

about your last sentence... you yourself are very young and quite often show your youth, as you do in that last sentence. you sound like a 12 year old complaining about the school bully. Do you realize that?

Anyways, I'll talk to ya later - take it easy."

Now maybe I'm over reacting to be offended by this response. Why is the longest sentence about me complaining again? Why is the point of my email REALLY ignored to the fact I made one sentence that made me sound young.

Wait. I am 21.

I wrote a response but I can't find it, but basically I brought up these points and more. It was past midnight, I was exhausted, confused and trying to bring humor to a situation. So I wrote him a big email asking him why he felt he needed to remind me of this fact, why that sentence stood out to much he needed to point it out to me. Why nothing else in the email seemed worthy of bringing up. I also told him perhaps because I forgot to mention the guy who's telling the rumor is 23, maybe that helps him understand. I told him I'm not mad, I'd just like clarification.

It's been five days and he hasn't bothered to write back. Plus when I tried to G-chat with him he said, I need to reply before we speak.

He broke the unicorn.