I arrived to get ready at my friend’s place. It was a friend of a friend’s place. If I had been informed that the person who had inhabited the apartment (and his boyfriend) had been up the entire night doing drugs and having sex, I would’ve been more quiet. I understand what it’s like to be tweaking out on drugs and want peace. Unfortunately, I hadn’t been informed so I let my voice ring out to the balcony!
My friend was an obscure Superman Villain and I was a SexPig. I called our costumes McCain/Palin, but one would expect I should be so witty. I crossed a line and made a joke about my recent spider bites and the host’s boyfriend, in tweaking glory, jumped up to the farthest corner away from me and screamed, “I will put up with a LOT of shit, but bugs isn’t one of them!”
The pause in the room between myself and him was one for the history books. I let out a laugh and muttered, “It was only...a joke.” He didn’t move, so I countered, “Would you...like me to...leave? The room?” I played the supporting role and took my exit.
On the streets things were calm again. We went to the first of two parties, the first was a Gay Geek’s “Alice in Wonderland” Themed Party. Luckily my hog outerwear allowed to me to take the role of the Pig-Baby the Duchess give’s Alice. Success!
Gay Geek’s are such an interesting breed of people. I see the strange Gay Geek Trait’s I still possess. Seeing them dating is even stranger. Proving that not just a beautiful body will find you love. I don’t know if I’d exchange it for love. Oh, how narcissistic I am!
It wasn’t until the Subway Ride to the next party that the real fun began! We were quickly surrounded by a group of Ghetto Thug Queers. Such a breed is rarely seen, but only on holidays and other special occasions. They surrounded my green partner and I.
“Who is you supposed to be?” One asked.
“I’m--a green man. My friend is a--pig.” We were wary, for the wrong phrasing could be our downfall.
The girls didn’t advance and my friend responded with, “What are you?” They were all wearing wearing various hoodies, sweaters and toile Ballet Skirts. As well as baseball caps on several of the heads, tilted to the side.
“I’m a princess.” The tallest one said softly, I leaned in and asked what she said. Only to discover she was a black boy in drag. Oh the wonders you can see, but only when you’re dressed as a sow. “You have amazing blue eyes!” This observation by them was so quick and took us by such surprise.
“Than-k yo-u.” I breathed and suddenly felt hot in my coat, it had to come off or I’d soon be dripping in sweat. Pig indeed! I started my Gypsy Rose Lee appreciation number and the Ghetto Thug Queers stood transfixed.
“Gurl! Take it OFF!” One shouted and I stripped off the coat and bent over, as only a pig should. The subway car erupted into a flurry of applause and catcalls. I started to snort and they ate it up. I had inadvertently become part of the Ghetto Thug Queer Society without even trying. “That is HAWT!” Another one shouted. Why do I do the things I do?
I suddenly became very aware of how exposed I was on a subway and quickly covered up. I was getting into character, but it’s Halloween. It should happen that way. The parting of my friend and I meant that I was now ready to fend for myself.
I boarded a different train and entered the car, it was hot again, I tried to do it casually. As casual as a boy in pink shorts, pig ears, snout and the words "Sluthole" written on his back can be. The rest of the car caught wind.
“Oh my lawd!” Those black ladies love to make their opinions known. “That’s terrific!” I smiled and snorted again, the movement of the fake nose with my breathing really gave people a laugh.
The train finally arrived and I made my way to the party, the neighborhood looked as if Halloween ended two hours ago. However, a boy in Pig Ears in Brooklyn isn’t an uncommon sight anymore.
I managed to find my way down the streets and arriving at the party. I came upstairs and my friend’s caught a view of me and some made it vocal they enjoyed it. So I began to be as dirty as I could be, that’s what SexPigs do. Lot’s of snorting and grinding of my hips. After about 45 seconds of my outrageous performance I looked around and noticed the entire room was staring, why shouldn’t they be? “He--Hello everyone! How are you?” I shouted and continued to run around the room snorting.
Oh the wonders when you wear a different nose. Why not be a little wild? It’s Halloween and you’re with friends. There was a cute sailor too, he kept looking at me. At that point though, I think it was of him wondering if I was simple.
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