SCENES WITH MY FRIENDS: Composer Collboration

ADVISORY WARNING: The following is a work of fiction. None of the things said are proven true. If they are in fact true, then that is merely a coincidence.

(IGUANA sits with FRIEND. It's Tony Award time and thus the conversation is always on some sort of theatre related topic! As the conversation has progressed, they have mixed in the topic of sex. Theatre and sex are IGUANA's two favorite topics and the limits of what comes out of his mouth are limitless. We tune in already in progress.)

IGUANA: (Sits up and his eyes open wide) A shock thought popped into my head! I dare not repeat it...

FRIEND: Well now you have too.

IGUANA: I wonder if Stephen Sondheim fisted Jerry Herman in his Dungeon while John Kander taped it? How strange would that be?! (Long pause)

IGUANA: (Beat) P.S. rumor on the street, from Mary Testa, is Sondheim has a dungeon. (They stare at each other and laugh hysterically at the same moment.)

FRIEND: Almost as weird as Patti snorting a line off Hal Prince's cock. (Laughs)

IGUANA: (Determined to push the limits.) Do you know Carol's famed Hello Dolly song, I Put My Hand In? (Sings) I put my hand in here? I put my hand in there? (FRIEND nods)

IGUANA: I always pictured her fisting Jerry Herman while singing it. (Both laugh)

FRIEND: Sondheim was very hot in his day.

IGUANA: And a total top I'm sure, but still if he has a Dungeon that means he's a man who doesn't discriminate, because you just need to put a mask on them.

(SCENE)

(Young Herman)

(Young Sondheim)

(She's fisting him in this photo)

P.S.

I <3 Filing away old playbills and production photos at Playbill.com!! I need to work in Woodside MORE than once a week!

Anita Morris with the replacement Guido in Nine.

Carol Channing and George Abbott. I have no idea really. It's probably 1994 here. So she's just revived Hello Dolly! and he's trying to figure out what they did to his script for Damn Yankees!

Carol Channing Asks You...

This is my last moment for begging. I've raised $550 for the AIDS Walk and I have only 50 more dollars until I reach my goal. I thank everyone who has donated already. But now Carol is asking you politely to donate. Just click on Carol Channing's pleading hand and you can give her money.

Plus she's just been robbed so she needs to make up the missing cash:



Or you can CLICK HERE and know that I'll love you forever if you donate!

Let's leave it at this. I know that one of my four (yes I have four now) readers has openly donated. While other ones of you have flaked out. I don't ask for much. It hurts my ego to know that only one of you really actively reads. This is an interactive blog.

But seriously, please just donate. It's nice to know you're doing something good for the world and not just living in your own self involved bubble. Which we are all guilty of doing. Thank you.

Kiki and Herb through the years

Last night I saw Paradise Park. Charles Mee's last play at Signature Theater. This was my least favorite but it had some stellar monologues. It was a little to steeped in symbolism. I really love Charles Mee. What I enjoy is the underlying message of all his bizarre plays is: Love. It's very sweet and romantic in a way. Then the rest of the plays are utterly insane.

I got Skidoo from my friend last night. It's not in stores and he had an old VHS (these are my friends). It's so trippy. Carol Channing's outfits are absolutely insane. I wonder if she provided them.

I also got Kiki & Herb's new DVD. Which was at the Knitting Factory, I was there. It's great to have a DVD that I was part of! What I love about the DVD though is it has older clips of Kiki and Herb through their decade of fame. Including a clip of 1993 where Kiki was merely long hair and a Heineken. The next clip is 1999 and it's absolutely amazing. Kiki is discussing world issues about Columbine, which she calls Concubine. It's horrible, but funny.

A Saturday Night at Home

I suppose that's okay. I'm rewatching Side Show and seeing if it lasts the test of time. I bought Ms. Buckley's new album today. I like her older feel and you can hear her age in her voice. That's obvious though.

Today seemed to be, "Lay at home and do nothing day" for everyone I know. I was supposed to meet with friends and they canceled. I was supposed to do something, yet nothing happened. I am looking at a new laptop and phone, which excites me. Yet I mourn for my bank account. I need to get both of these items, I'm not such a good consumer though. I just want all Mac products...iPhone and MacBook. Once I get my tax refund (if I'm not arrested by the IRS first...long story, let's say my name isn't actually Iguana for certain reasons).

So yes, back to being alone. Last night I went to a little get together/game night at a friend of a friends. It was a gay gathering and I wore a tight shirt for such purposes. I was quickly announced as 22 immediately and knew my jig was up. The older men hit on me, how grand...I don't remember how many there were. It was mainly couples, couples make me mad because I am not one. Sure there is the Tall Man...but it's not that or I'd be there right now.

Instead my insanity catches up with me and I send texts asking when I can see him again. Bleh.

Moving along. Carol Channing does it again and stuns me with her greatness. Dr. Timothy Leary raved about this movie. I need to find it: