Expecting people to give their free time for 12+ Hours is somewhat ridiculous to me. Despite that, I will be on set from approximately 2PM to 1AM. Oh phew, they just got under 12 hours. I'm grateful.
I'm swallowing my pride, annoyance and anger. I am going to be calm. There are lots of other people at their wits end. I am annoyed by my tongue and how sharp it's become. This month has turned me into a stressed out monster. We're going to be better, starting right now.
Last night I went on a non-date with a guy from Group. We rode throughout Brooklyn on a Vespa. He spent the night on my couch. We both are good at following rules. Another Hot Dumpling, which is funny that I'd run into two in such short time.
The Vespa ride was the best part of the night. The dinner, his company and the live music were all terrific too, but to ride around this city. The air, night and city passing by. Having a conversation with someone, while you cling for dear life. I was terrified but invigorated.
Then when the rain came, how funny. It wasn't a sexually charged date, just two people enjoying life. It was pleasant and it got tricky as the night moved on. He spent the night, on my couch. Which makes me laugh and I appreciate that he had that strength. In my state, I don't think I'd have that willpower.
It's what we're working on right now. You need to gain back those morals.
Oh, I'd write more, but that damned movie calls. Calm, calm, calm. I shall be calm and graceful. Bringing books and homework to look at in the downtime, I'll probably end up on set for shoots, but I can switch off with someone.
Grant me the strength . . .
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