Who Is At Fault?; A Study in Stubbornness

Who Is At Fault; Or A Study in Stubbornness

(IGUANA and MOM are talking on the phone. IGUANA is doing things around campus, while MOM is sitting in the kitchen. They are about five minutes into a conversation.)

MOM: How is work going?

IGUANA: I need to talk with dad. I don't want to talk about jobs and money with you anymore.

MOM: Okay? Why not?

IGUANA: Listen, I really don't want to get into it. I just know that it's not going to help matters.

MOM: Oh, really. . .

IGUANA: I know if I talk about this, you'll get mad. So there's no point, I just have come to this decision that I need to talk to dad about it and not you. I will tell you when I have a job and if I have money. . .

MOM: Oh. Well. Then. I'm gonna go and pick up your brother. . .

IGUANA: Oh, don't do that. I just know--

MOM: Why won't you talk to me about your job then!?

IGUANA: Listen, you think back to what you said last week. I was insulted . . .

MOM: You told me what I should be doing with me life. You think that's fair? You told me what I should be doing with my money! What about a "Thank you" for all the things we've done for you up to this point?

IGUANA: I appreciate it, and I know I will forever be bound to you for these things. I said you should sell your car. As a jok--

MOM: Do you think that's fair? You told me what I should do. If you wanna talk about rude. . .

IGUANA: Listen, I know. That's why I am not talking about these things with you. I said something and you responded and that response took me by surprise. I have made my decisions on what to talk and not talk about with you. I will talk to dad about money and job issues from now on.

MOM: Well, that's fine! I have news for you. Every money issue discussed in this house goes through me. So anything you tell your father. I will know!

Now I'd like to take a moment in this scene to stop and take a breath. I will admit, the next part is my fault.

IGUANA: That is terrific. I am still going to talk to him. I know that I am no longer going to rely on you for support. I don't want to anymore. I just feel like you haven't been respecting--

MOM: Oh. Okay. You need to--

IGUANA: (Shouting) Oh. Okay. Just downplay my emotions some more! I will TALK TO YOU LATER! (Hangs up phone.)

Seriously, what kind of ending line is that?