The Day After Pill

Christmas arrived and I got an Xbox 360! That was supposed to be my initial reaction, but then life happened and I got more and more poor, etc. Before the reality could set in, I spent the $100 dollars more I needed to make my Xbox 360 complete.

I'm glad I have the newest in ridiculousness-technology. I wrote that list sometime in August if I remember correctly. The times since have changed and I felt it weird to retract my request. So I am content that I got this ridiculous box of entertainment.

That aside I am going to play games like GTA IV, Oblivion and Silent Hill: Homecoming. I enjoy GTA IV because I see streets that I've lived on. It mirrors it frighteningly well. I was in Grand Army Plaza today and almost died when I looked at a replica of the Brooklyn Public Library!

I was supposed to go out with an acquaintance from the city who is from Saratoga. I don't know if it will happen, but we were supposed to get drinks in Albany. I once shared a sofa with him after a night of crazy partying. We drank a lot and the capillaries in my nostrils may have shed a little more light on the subject. We ended the night buying microwave pizza (or was it waffles?) and gobbling them down. Then we shared the sofa, nothing sexual, just two random guys cuddling on a sofa because they were to far gone to enjoy anything more.

Wow, that was a memory I haven't relived in some time. Funny how we have those little stories in our lives. Or is it just me? We of course have met before in other social situations. I've shared seats next to him at plays and in bars. We've laughed and felt together. He's a nice guy, but I think tonight may not mount to anything. My bones are cold and I am sleepy.

I've never gone out to the bars upstate, I'm slightly curious. The acquaintance has dubbed Albany: Trashtastic. My first bar outings were in the city, isn't that an odd thought? I will make a point of going out tomorrow!

This morning I had a wet dream. It was so quick and sudden. Not hot at all actually. I dreamt that I was dry humping some guy I worked on that TV Pilot gig. A couple of humps in and I came all over his fully clothes body. Hotness!

There's been a big discussion of my future, as usual. I am still figuring it out, being here doesn't necessarily help. Seeing high school friends and who's engaged to who, it doesn't intrigue me. Do people think marriage at 22 is a wise choice? Having a baby at 23 is an okay decision?

Perhaps some people have that maturity in them. I would like to think I am capable of that, but it just seems that people are just agreeing to being bored. Oh, how I so wish I could be boring.

Being up here, 9 PM feels so late. I want to be in my PJs, but in case that guy calls. I shared a sofa with him, I owe him past 9 PM.

The Terror of Being Alone

Well I did it, I spent the day by myself. It was tough, but I manged to put my thoughts in order and not left the house in 72 hours. A sensation within itself. I only felt cabin fever a couple of times. I haven't worn a shirt in a while, it feels nice to be shirtless. I may stay that way forever. Ah, for the days of the warrior.

I worked on my solo performance piece, just writing down pieces of memory of the last couple of months. It's difficult to do, but I want to. To recount what I've chosen to remember and decided to forget. It's a patchwork of writing, I'll piece it together when it's all there.

I have been playing Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. It's the funniest game because half the time the ghetto speak means nothing to me. A character keeps using the term water, but I think he means booze. Stuff like that.

This was meant to go somewhere, but unfortunately it's not.

I Love the Way the Cougars Look in This

Once again, I love this comic.

Level 7: Signing the Lease

Why does moving and life suddenly feel like a Zelda game or a King's Quest classic from Sierra? It's been level after level. Seeing the place, making the decision when things got rough. Getting the security deposit and testing the keys. Calling Time Warner for Internet service.

Now signing the lease was a chore. I had to wake at 10 am because it was the only time Elizabeth and I could sign together. Elizabeth heard wrong and said we could pay by cheque. Wrong. So as she went off to work I had to hop into the landlord's car and drive to Brooklyn's Chinatown (only two avenues away) to an ATM that wouldn't work.

Mind you I needed to take out over 1,000 bucks. So that was already a gamble. So we luckily drove to another one (my iPhone wasn't working as well as I hoped.) and we went to as my landlord called it, "Jew Town" so the bank we found obviously wasn't open.

Oh, did I mention how my landlord gave me the skinny on how Hasids have sex. Oh, juicy indeed! It involves a sheet with a hole and a placing of the hat. That was before he told me about his journey to a strip club and catching Hasids there with their curls pushed back! Buzz, buzz.

The 1,000 dollar limit had been reached so I had to use my parent's emergency Credit Card. I feel bad, but they'll get their money back. And mind you it was an emergency. I had beat the ATM beast! Advance to Level 8: Moving.

Level 9: Living Without a Toilet Seat or Internet is a dozy!

Then I had to make a much longer than necessary trip back home via the Subway. Escape from Jew Mountain! Flaming Stars of David and yarmulkes as far as the eye can see!

Picture-A-Day #77

Looking like a Ghost from the Fatal Frame Franchise. Meaning what you would get in points would probably be significant because you took a head-on shot (meaning you probably upgrade your camera now!) Therefore stunning the ghost from attacking you for a short amount of time. Thank God you decided to equip the stun feature before you met up with this ghost!

I am a geek, sometimes. And I miss Fatal Frame, it's one of the only games that REALLY made me nervous and I don't think I've ever beaten one because they frightened me so much. I mean all you had was a camera for protection! And in order to damage the ghosts, you needed to take pictures of them. Meaning you had to wait until they we in the camera's view finder to damage them! But what was worst was you needed to capture a certain part of their face to deal damage and get points. They would always be looking at the floor or something.

This picture of the day took me far to long to create. Only proves that I am artsy deep down inside still.

The Gaymer

First, the time change has taken me for a surprise. Last night on the train I was making good time at getting home. Next thing I know it's 3 am and I'm horribly late. So needless to say I woke up to late to go to the gym. I am a little upset. Now, why I am more upset...

The Gaymer. A species that I once thought I belonged to. A gaymer for those of you who don't know is a gay man who plays video games. Excessively. I used to revel in the fact that I was one. I was subversive being a homo who played games! It was a defining feature of my life. "I'm gay and I played all of King's Quest growing up as a kid..." Does that ring a bell? Anyone...hello is this thing on? If I told someone that statement and they didn't understand then I knew there was no hope. If a guy didn't play video games...what was the point?

Then life set in. Not there is anything wrong with a gay man who plays video games. Actually it's still very cute. Correction, it's still very cute until last night. For you see last night I was invited to a midnight Gaymer release party of Super Smash Brothers Brawl for the Wii. There were several things wrong with this scenario: It was daylights savings and the game wasn't released until midnight, it was in Harlem and OH I've never played a Wii until a couple weeks ago!

So I have concluded (at least from the invited guests of this party) that there are two types of Gaymers. The incredibly hot ones and the mild ones. Gaymers have this intellect of uselessness that comes off as cocky, but utterly attractive. If it's a hot one, then it's even better. Along with this intellect also comes a condescending. Enter me.

I who have not half the video game powers I used to. I'm a veteran. I can remember the good times, but I believe the present has fallen on squalor. There has been a game able to make me feel motivated for years. So I enter this room of a mix of hot and mild. And now ladies an gentlemen I will begin to analyze...

Before I begin, life has give me a blessing. My blond hair. This is a lesser known fact, but I am sort of a method actor. When I enter a social situation when I know no one and I feel a little intimidated I rely on one thing and let it go where it takes me. Last night it took me father than I ever thought I could go. Being blond I can throw out some choice statements and instantly no one takes me seriously. I know it's abusing my intelligence, but I knew the rules of the game. I have developed a perfect blank stare and look of utter disbelief. If I tried to pretend I was up to date with the Wii or I knew what was going on they would have quickly caught on and rubbed it in harder. If they all felt less threatened, they'd embrace me. Even if only a little.

God, I feel like Jane Goodall.

The couple hosting the party were very gracious. There was one who was a little more intense, but I could tell from the look in his eyes he held a brutish demeanor but would crumble just as easily as the rest. Regardless, I liked him and his geekiness.

Then there was another couple. One thin as a stick and cute in that gaymer way. The other large (very) an not really social. I also noticed he didn't play video games that much either, from his lack of knowing how to play Mario Party 8. He hated me and the act I put up. I wanted to pull him aside and whisper, "Listen friend, I am on your side! Hate what you see, but don't hate me because after tonight we will share a bond larger than the two of us combined!" Yet, to break face would be disastrous. We've gotten through the couples...

Then there is the Hot Gaymers. Now they are what does it for me. If I played video games still I would probably be this. Well, duh. This particular one was defensive of me from the moment I entered the room. I noticed his quick looks and snide comments. I can handle him, with my mask on I didn't really care. Besides I wasn't in competition tonight, I was there as an observer.

Hot Gaymers of my age have something to prove. They want to be free and wild. Sleep with anyone they can, because they know where they stand! That's fine, really. But because they are used to competition through games they are equally competitive in the ways of the bedroom. Entering a room full of gay men is just like Pac-Man. Eat the fruit and gobble up anyone worth points. When I entered the room the game was on.

Yet the catch is Hot Gaymers are "friendly." They are so unsure of themselves that they have a belief that they must be every one's friend. They are nice and flirt with everyone. Not just one person, they want to make sure they have all venues open. Just in case one falls through. Speaking from personal experiencing, I learned that those kinds of people are the saddest. Always avoiding and never confronting, it's okay if some people dislike you. It really is.

I was fine with him until a second hot gaymer showed up. Now when you have more than one joined in battle, it's like Hyena's. They are sneakier than they seem. The second one was on the border of Gaymer and the border of Bitchy.

At this point I had already portrayed myself as the dumb blond so I couldn't go back on it. Of course we all know how blonds react when they are bombarded with bitchy comments. They take it like Jesus Christ did on the cross. So I pulled a Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf and got drunk. Or as Brick once said, "I looked for my click..."

It's funny that before coming there I was excited but felt a nagging on the back of my neck the entire day. Then I remembered what that nagging was...

Did Jane Goodall ever have to deal with a bitchy Gorilla?