A New York City Day — A True Story

There are days when you wake up, you walk out your door and you see the rabbit hole. You think, "I shouldn't go in there." But your Alice Intuition tells you to and you've always liked Alice better than logical sense.

Yesterday was truly a New York City Day. Unfortunately, those of you who don't live here can't understand what a New York City Day is. It's a day where you do so much that, explaining it to others who don't live here, seems wasteful. It always make for a fun story though!

They can't comprehend what it's like to arrive at a Drag Queen's apartment at 10:30 AM, with her Majesty already in full drag. You hop in a cab and drive up to Central Park with her while she looks at you in her regal way and says, "Your job today is to make me laugh...for 6 hours...That's all I ask of you."

You climb up a subtle incline in the park at noon. A Drag Queen with green tresses in a fake fur coat, her personal assistant and you. She walks the path as if she's Mother Teresa on the streets of Calcutta. Giving rice to the hungry, while she breathes, "Oh, Veronica! It's a wonderful day to be out in the world!"

You stop and think. What? How did I get here? It's fun, yes! But it doesn't seem right! This isn't a day anyone else has. What is amazing is how natural the events occur. How could it possibly get any stranger?! Maybe it can't--

As you near the top of the incline you see a small gathering of people. You have just arrived at your destination! The Poly-amorous Pride Event! "Oh, what a dump!" Her of the Royal Blood says. "And of course they asked me to host! There's no one here! At least they have a stage. When I hosted last year it was a soap box and some crate paper!"



A celebration of strange people: People who love to love! The strangest collection of Misfit Toys you will ever meet. There were threesome couples, foursome couples, married couples with lovers who were aware of each other. Babies?! Were the babies Poly-amorous?? Poly-Amorous Dogs! Needless to say, it didn't surprise me when I found out everyone here only spoke in Rhyme & Riddle.


Yet, I feel so calm here. I knew it was a world I don't care for, but why not? These people believe a Drag Queens can save your soul and so do I! When asked if she was a Monogamist (the opposite of Poly-Amorous), the picture of Regal Glory responded:

Why let me think? I'm a Mon--Moh--Mah-- Yes! I am a mahoganist! I have a deep love for mahogany furniture that cannot be contained.

I fell to the ground in Rapture! It was a strange day indeed! I watched and joked, while she ruled over the crowd. Then when not in front of her loyal people she questioned their beliefs?

I don't get this whole thing? You either need to have no ego or one of them has to have ALL ego and control the others. Can't we just return to the days where we cheat and never tell our loved one? The rules were you fuck around, don't make it a regular habit, and never do it in the bed. You can fuck on the floor next to the bed. Don't break those rules and everyone will be happy?

Her logic made some sense. I know my ego is to big to be dating more than one person at the same time. Also, if this was the largest group of PPP (Proud Poly-Amorous People) they could find, then the dating pool was a little shallow.

Then there was my Wonderland-esque Poly-Amorous Job! I was to pass a card. I was here to pass a card from my left to the right! It was hysterical, but it felt so much better to be doing this job than working in a cubicle all day!

Alas, the theme of the day was nothing is to unusual. As the day continued I eventually had to leave her Royal Highness's presence seeing as I was needed at a event more usual event.


Now this part you cannot truly believe unless you see it. Describing it is almost impossible. I have never been to a show that is such an experience as this. It was like living a weird dream. Observe: