Having to explain my theater tattoos to theatrical people. Odd right? Anita Morris is my partner for life. We've been going together for about two years now and I NEVER regret her. My tattoos are brilliant! Absolutely brilliant! I am a fan, so what? Anita Morris was the perfect female archetype and I celebrate that. Anita Morris, Judy Garland, Tennessee Williams are three different people who I find so amazing I don't care what people think.Yet.
I find it difficult to explain when people don't know me. Especially people who will recognize Anita Morris. Who will ask me, "Did you see her in Nine?" And I can only answer:
Only through research.
Without further adieu. A Rewriting of The Rose Tattoo*...
(IGUANA is in his cubicle printing out every article written by a freelance reporter who doesn't own his own printer. IGUANA sits there smiling at the irony. SUPERVISOR enters the cubicle. He is a man born without humor or a single emotion in his body. He is Asian.)*The following play is a work of fiction. Any events that resemble real life are purely coincidence.
SUPER: (Softly spoken) Iguana? Hi, are you, uh, busy? I want you to-- (Turns head and is inaudible) --This is the President of Musical Fold!
IGUANA: (Dumbstruck and unprepared for such a surprise on his second day.) OH! Hello! Very nice to meet you! Thank you for choosing me! I'm so happy to be here! I know you won't regret it!
PRESIDENT: Hello. What is that on your arm?
IGUANA: (Timidly) It's...(Goes with it). It's my tattoo. Of Anita Morris. You know, from Nine.
SUPER: Uh...yes...
PRESIDENT: Do I remember? Of course. She was a lady! Her dance was absolutely unforgettable.
SUPER: I...uh...remember that show...with Anto--
IGUANA: (Nervous) Yes! It's just funny--You're the first person to ask--Of course THE PRESIDENT would ask me about my theater tattoos!
PRESIDENT: Well you got it for a reason! To talk about it! (IGUANA stops himself.)
SUPER: Did you uh...see her perform in it?
IGUANA: Of course! (Aside) Well only with archival abilities.
PRESIDENT: What do you do for school? Where do you go?
IGUANA: BKLYN College.
PRESIDENT: Great school!
IGUANA: I'm a theater B.A. Which means I'm not going for acting...
PRESIDENT: (Understated) Good move. What do you want to do?
(IGUANA opens eyes wide. The $500,000 question has been placed on the table and as usual he is without a response.)
IGUANA: Just getting my hands wet and seeing what I'd like to do. (Aside) Which I'm sure I'll realize with all this data entry work. These mundane tasks are sure to clarify things.
SUPER: (Over IGUANA's aside) I--uh--went to school for--
IGUANA: But I'm sure I'll figure it out one of these days.
PRESIDENT: Well, it was nice meeting you. Make connections it's how you thrive here! (Exits before he finishes his sentence.)
(BLACKOUT)
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